© Rajah’s Story – An Indian Idiocy … err Odyssey

© Rajah’s Story – An Indian Idiocy … err Odyssey 

Just listen closely to my story; I’m from the Rajah Sacrum Tribe, the oldest family alive.

All over India, my businesses thrive and I lend money with Rajacash Rub Remit.

My company - Rajah Resubmit Car is the most honest used car dealership by far; it’s legit!

Expect exotic flavours but have no worries with Rajah Amber Citrus curry.

So, like to dance in a hurry? Take a chance at Rajah Rumbas Trice, quicker’n Arthur Murray!

All women will agree with me that Rajah Cream Rubs It out effectively. And for mummies,

Rajahs Erratic Bum is another company I run, supplying medicine for upset tummies.

To ensure people are not sick, I developed Rajah Meats Rubric to show the right way to cook.

How do I do it? Some prefer fish and A Rajahs Brim Cruet is perfect for fish oil, just look.

Undertake my advice, Rajah Rats Bum Rice is really very nice, in fact it’s best of all.

Relax sahibs, keep calm, I have my own farm: Rajah Acres Bit Rum supply food and alcohol

Comparable to the best in the West; and please try a wine from Rajah Muscat Brier: it’s fine...

Rajah Barter Music is very jolly; reproduces the finest that Bollywood has to offer today.

Another interest is music tuition although many find the Rajah Sitar Cumber-some to play.

I am the Rajah Mature Cribs, in my position I tell no lies, falsehoods or fibs; it’s true!

But I’m also Rajah Satire Crumb and I have come from India to thumb my nose at you.

Is Rajah Carter Bum the same man who plays on tabla drums? That is being another clue!

Sometimes in India we ride on elephants and Rajah Bar Rectum Is wearing no underpants?

Regretfully, is true when he takes tourists on safari with no Sari, Rajah Curb Met no resistance.

And when you’re next in India and in dire need too, Barrister Majah Cu will look after you.

Just surrender your passport and rupees, please to Rajah Sacrum Biter – a righter of wrongs.

And he is a singer of songs as Rajah Brace, I Strum to keep pace on the ukulele, wearing thongs.

Here is my favourite, “It’s my japarti and I’ll cry if I want to”... Hah, a Rajah Ruse Act, Brim full,

Customers of silly jokes; but now I will take you good folk to Rajah True Mac Ribs to refuel.

Alleged, by my good self, to be the best takeaway Indian grub, but first you Merit A Rajah Scrub.  

Rub a dub dub in the Rajah Cream Tub Sir, guaranteed it’s the thing you need to really clean up.

Toes especially need attention, did I mention to Scream? Rajah Rub It in hard, sandals barred!

Even during monsoon season, ladies, Rajah Bra Cut Miser ensures that underwear stays dry.

Relatively few realise, who is in charge of the circus: as Rajah Master, I Curb wild animals,

Believing that training manuals can teach you what to do with help from Tamer Sahib Jar Cur...

Understand is another family member of the Rajah Sacrum Tribe, the oldest family alive.

Maybe your trip to India has been grave? *Fir Milenge, I return you now to James Arthur Craib.

*Fir Milenge (see you) – Hindi